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Penguin Joke


This article isn’t really anything to do with darts other than it’s writing was prompted by a darts night, was about one of my team mates and is an extract from one of the darts reports that I wrote. (Be warned the ending to the joke is also quite RUDE!)

It started with our Captain being away for a couple of weeks and being replaced in the Captains League match by another player who won by throwing somewhat better than our Captain normally did. A comment was made that we could well jump up the Captains league table the next week if he played again and if our Captain stayed away a few more weeks we would soon be top in the Captains League!

That was a bit unkind really because our Captain was a Falklands veteran and was absent because he had gone over there for a big reunion. His Lady friend, was expecting to get some chocolates when he came back, but she said she was not expecting much. She said, “Knowing him it will probably only be a chocolate bar, maybe a Penguin.” 
I commented that personally knowing him I thought he would even get that wrong and bring back the wrong sort of penguin!

Someone said they knew our Captain before he joined the parachute regiment and he was much taller then, before he kept landing on his head. They added that he kept thinking he was bungee jumping when he went out of the plane and he thought he did not need his parachute as he would bounce back up. (He didn't, he broke his back twice before being invalided out of the forces.) Another player said that our Captain was also a private detective at one time. I think the Americans call them “Dicks.” Some of us think he still is!

Going back to the penguin theme I was reminded of a rather rude, religious joke. So read on……….

The seven dwarfs go to the Vatican and are ushered in to see the Pope.
Dopey leads the pack. "Dopey, my son," says the Pope, "What can I do for you?"
Dopey asks, "Excuse me your Holiness, but are there any dwarf Nuns in the Falkands?"
The Pope wrinkles his brow at the odd question, thinks for a moment and answers, "No, Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in the Falkands."
In the background, a few of the dwarfs start giggling. Dopey turns around and glares, silencing them.
Dopey turns back, "Your Worship, are there any dwarf nuns in Europe?"
The Pope, puzzled now, again thinks for a moment and then answers, "No, Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in Europe."
This time, all of the other dwarfs burst into laughter. Once again, Dopey turns around and silences them with an angry glare. Dopey turns back and says, "Mr. Pope! Are there ANY dwarf nuns anywhere in the world?"
The Pope, really confused by the questions says, "I'm sorry, my son, there are no dwarf nuns anywhere in the world."
The other dwarfs collapse into a heap, rolling and laughing, pounding the floor, tears rolling down their cheeks, as they begin chanting......
"Dopey shagged a penguin! Dopey shagged a penguin!" 
The article then ended with me apologising to our Captain and pointing out that one of the opposition had suggested that I write the article!

 

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